I worked as a freelance virtual assistant for quite some time earning a meager income for some personal and other expenses at home. Then last year 2024, our father died from chronic kidney disease, and I have no choice but to find a stable permanent job (mostly office-based on-site location). I searched for a BPO company for a while because I always have bad timing. I almost got hired from a BPO company with healthcare account but at the time it's almost New Year and I have to skip the assessment the final step to hiring so I did not pursue my application. Until one day I got the perfect time to apply for this company. The entire application was done virtually online so I have the convenience of applying at the comforts of my home without the need to apply in person on location.
I did pass the application and started my journey on my first real office job in years. I prayed a lot so I can take this job seriously and do my job effectively and efficiently. I prayed that the company I am working for and with the colleagues I am working with will be kind to me and make this work easy to bear with and not add to stress and pressure. I pray that nothing personal will come out of it including love but just pure business.
Well, it turns out to be fine at the beginning during the training. I never had an absent and only one 12 minutes late because of transportation (it's difficult to commute at night in a far small farming town away from semi urban areas where the offices are located). The training though is fast paced only 1 month and 3 weeks even if the process and tools are complicated and it takes a while for us to absorb the entire policy and rules. We survived and passed the training and only more than a dozen of us left to do live calls in the production floor. My prayer was effective somehow. I am relieved that I never fell to my feet among my colleagues, but never did I think I will fall to my feet with an individual inside the production floor.
On the very day we set foot on the production floor to take calls after a few minutes we sit and prepare our desktop pc, I saw this chubby looking man walking like a tough man inside the floor about 5'5" in height with his freshly bathed long hair down swaying her hair like a woman while walking to his workstation. I concentrated for a while answering calls in my workstation which is just a few workstations in front adjacent to him in opposite direction when in several minutes I saw him glancing my way flirting like a gay man having her hair down on his chair. I was shocked in surprise of course because I did not expect anyone to notice me let alone admire me. I think he is exaggerating or faking it because I know a gay guy would not do this immediately, I know something is amiss and that there is something more to that than they show. I was hoping they come clean with themselves. Wish granted and just a few days later the guy let me know that he is bisexual and that he has a girlfriend for how long they were in a committed relationship which I am not interested to learn. I was really hurt and heartbroken then when I returned home, I just cry a little to sleep. When I woke up that afternoon, I got the resolved to not let damning revelation and hurtful truth ruin my day and that I appreciated that he is honest and did not hide it from me. After that I become happy again and this guy really is determined to get to know me because he is slowly gaining traction, he is slowly talking to my colleagues and teammates and that he really wanted to get close to me. Sometimes in just little gestures I know he cares. Suddenly fate has decided for us. I got fired from the job I work for a few months, and the blossoming love story is abruptly got cut short. I was hurt not because I lost a job losing me an earning but because I lost my chance at love. For me, it is more difficult to find love than finding a job nowadays. He is not the only guy who notice me, but I am aware of some others in the office who glances my way, and I am aware of that. At least any one of them has a potential to be a match for me not just that one long hair tattooed bisexual guy who I have a spark and have a deep connection with. I feel like he is my soulmate, but nothing is set in stone and destiny like fate is just a cruel joke. I know this scene really well and I am very sure he will not pursue me after I left the company because we barely know each other and we don't have any contact information we can get a connection with in the first place though the emotional bond and connection is very strong he is also in a relationship with a woman so he is not at a loss but I think very happy and that he forgot about me already not pursuing me anymore. I am slowly losing my thought and feelings about him knowing that he has someone to keep and invest his love, energy and time with. I can move on slowly now though I still have small wounds, yet it is healing, and I can find someone anew someone who I will have a connection with and that he is already I can keep for good. I am gay and I want the same. I want the whole love, attention, time and energy solely or exclusively for me and vice versa. I think I deserve the whole love I receive the same entire whole love I can give to my partner. Thank you for listening for my story. Any questions will be responded, and any feedback will be appreciated.
